Most of you have at least heard of The Secret, if you have not already read it. While you can pick up a copy pretty much anywhere at this point, there are some concepts that aren't made clear within the actual pages of the book. Is it possible that the Universe already knew that the book and the numerous ideas contained within would someday spark a literal empire? Possibly...? No, definitely! But there are a few things that are absent in the book its self, and I'm going to share them with you today.
Most of you will have seen, read or at least heard of the movie/book The Secret. I’m immensely grateful to the creators of The Secret for getting the idea of the Law of Attraction out there to the masses. People are now asking questions that they would never have asked before, and they’ve at least been exposed to the idea that we have more control over our fate than we’ve been taught to believe. Sure, the movie only skimmed the surface of what the Law of Attraction is really all about, kind of like explaining the concept of gravity by dropping an apple and watching it fall to the ground. You get the “gist” of what gravity is all about, but you can’t utilize that knowledge to send a rocket to the moon. So, while a simple reading of The Secret isn’t going to give you a real understanding of the Law of Attraction, it managed to get a lot of people interested in learning more. And because the movie’s aim was to appeal to as large an audience as possible, the irony is, it kind of had to keep “the secret” a secret. I have no such restriction.
I had a bit of a quantum leap recently. It wasn’t my first and I’m sure it won’t be my last, and yes, I know that I advise against them because they can be uncomfortable, but I happen to be one of those head through the wall people who will put up with that discomfort to facilitate my growth. And then, I share that growth with you, so that you can also benefit from my discomfort. I’m pretty sure this makes me some kind of saint or martyr or something. You’re welcome.
This latest quantum leap led to some major insights (mind = FUBAR), with the main one being a much deeper and more complete understanding of how we manifest our reality. And although I usually like to wait until I’ve fully processed a new insight before I write about it publicly, I can’t do that this time. It seems that this information wants to come out. Now. It won’t leave me alone. Someone out there really wants to learn this stuff. With a vengeance. So, I hope you’re ready for this, because I’m about to give you the secret. [queue dramatic music - Pum Pum Pum!]
Step 1 – Focus on what you want
I’m going to make this one quick, because you’ve heard this stuff a thousand times before. Focus on what you want instead of what you don’t want. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You get it.
But, do you really get what it is you’re doing when you focus on something (even what you don’t want?) All of our power is in our ability to focus. All of it. And when we focus on something, we are saying “I want to include this in my reality”, no matter if we want it or not. This is why we should never focus on anything we don’t want, unless it’s briefly, to help us further define what we do want. This is where our work is – ALL our work. If we put any effort into anything, it should be into practicing how to focus on the wanted instead of the unwanted.
That’s it. That’s all the work we need to do. And, it’s all the work we should do, because our insistence on “helping” the process along in the next steps (trying to make it happen) is pretty much what mucks it all up.
Step 2 – Get into a state of allowing
Again, you’ve heard of this before. But do you get what that really means? I didn’t. Not until my little mind blowing insight recently. Allow me (pun fully intended) to explain:
The state of allowing is the state of being fully present in the moment. That sounds nice, right? Well, this is the hard part. Most of us don’t know how to really do that. What does it feel like to be fully present? Well, I can’t really tell you. You have to experience it (psych!). But I can tell you what it doesn’t feel like:
When you’re fully present, you are not judging the moment. Have you ever had a great meal and thought “I’m having such a great time, but I wish so-and-so was here.” You weren’t fully present. When you wish that the moment were different in any way, you are judging it to be lacking and you are not allowing it to be exactly as it is.
When you’re fully present, you are not trying to MAKE anything happen. There is no effort in allowing. There may be action (more on that later), but there is no effort. You’re not trying to manipulate the moment. You’re not trying to change it in any way.
When you’re fully present, you are living in the NOW, not the future or the past. You can’t compare a moment to the past without judging it. And you can’t worry about the future and still be present in the NOW.
When you’re fully present, you are not self-conscious. You are not worried what others are thinking of you, how you look, or if you’re doing it right. You are so caught up in the moment that those kinds of thoughts cease to exist. You become the center of the Universe and everything around you is there to surprise and delight you. You see the perfection of everything (because everything is a perfect reflection of your vibration). You feel the power that you have – everything and everyone in your reality is a manifestation of yours.
When you’re fully present, there is no fear. You can’t be fully present in the now and wonder what might go wrong at the same time. You can’t be fully present and think ugly thoughts about yourself. Fear can’t exist when you’re in a complete state of allowing.
When you’re in a full state of allowing, time ceases to exist. You lose complete track of how long you’ve been doing something when you’re fully immersed in the moment.
When you’re fully present, there is no wanting. There is nothing that you want, need or have to have. You are appreciating the moment, unaware of what’s missing and not judging it in any way. In that moment, everything is completely perfect. It’s not that you couldn’t see anything unwanted, as much as that you just don’t.
Everyone stumbles into a state of complete allowing from time to time. Usually, we remember these moments as the highlights of our lives. These are times when we find ourselves, inadvertently, completely and totally happy. It happens when we fully connect with someone, like when we make love, for example. It may happen during a sporting event (like when the Red Sox won the World Series), or when you made the perfect basket without even thinking about it. We call it being “in the zone” and most people have no idea that this state of mind can be practiced and orchestrated, much less how to do it.
But this state of complete allowing is an integral part of how we can deliberately manifest reality, and what’s more, when we learn to find this state often and on purpose, our lives become a hell of a lot more fun.
You see, life is supposed to be fun. We are not here to observe, or to prove anything or to suffer. God no! We are here to play. Pure and simple. And this is where the next step comes in.
Step 3 – Follow your intuition and play
Once you’ve focused on what you wanted, you’ve begun the process of bringing it into your reality. When you get into a state of allowing, you speed up the process, by not contradicting that energy. When you’re in a state of allowing, you offer no resistance to what you want. So, why don’t we just focus and then spend the next couple of weeks meditating? Well, meditation is a great way to get into a general state of allowing. But, and this is a big BUT, meditation is simply a tool that we can use to train ourselves to find that state of allowing (just like visualization is a tool we use to help us focus). It is NOT how we are supposed to spend the majority of our time. Why? Because, while meditation feels good, there is something so much better: A state of allowing coupled with play.
The perfect state of allowing can be found between trying to control the moment and simply observing it. We aren’t supposed to work at making anything happen, but neither are we supposed to just stand back and watch (which is basically what meditation is). We are here to immerse ourselves in reality, to get our hands dirty, to fully experience all this physical reality has to offer, to use and completely enjoy our physical senses, to interact. We are here to play.
And when we’re in a state of complete allowing, our intuition will guide us to not only the most fun way to play, but the most fun way to play that will lead us straight to what we want. Our intuition may inspire us to action. It may inspire us to simply enjoy (fully) what’s happening around us. It may bring other players to us, or it may lead us to them. As long as we follow that inner guidance, we will be led to more and more truly awesome experiences the likes of which we couldn’t even dream of.
The jam session
Imagine a bunch of musicians in a jam session. The drummer usually starts first. He sets the beat. The other musicians listen to that beat. They listen for what they hear – and every musician will hear something different. Little by little, each musician will chime in with their own interpretation. None of them will play the exact same thing as another. None of them are leading the song, and none are really following anyone. They are each doing their own thing, following their own heart, creating their own masterpiece. And yet, each musician contributes to the whole, perfectly complementing the others to create a magnificent melody (yep, I heard it. Shaddap).
Our interaction with our physical environment, including (and especially) that with other people, is just like that. You don’t have to try and force the other musicians to play just like you. You don’t have to copy anyone else. You don’t have to worry about sounding off (if you do, it will mess up your mojo and screw up the perfection of your song).
If you hold back, you’ll miss out on the richness of the experience. But if you let yourself just go with it, follow your heart and just enjoy the moment, if you allow yourself to become fully immersed in the experience, the result will be nothing short of inspired awesomeness. This is where genius lives. This is where joy resides. This is where the expression “F%$k Yeah!” was born.
Obstacles are part of the process
Now, most of us aren’t able to hold a state of complete allowing all the time (ok, most of us can’t hold onto it at all, but with practice, we can get better at it). There will be times in between those periods of allowing when we sort of dip a little bit. There will even be times when we experience negative emotions, unwanted experiences and even illness. And that’s all ok. It’s all perfect.
You see, when we do the work of focusing and line ourselves up with what we want, we start to move toward it. It’s like we start driving down a road toward our wanted destination. And on that road, we encounter obstacles. These are manifestations of our resistance – beliefs and thoughts we have that will keep us from reaching our destination. If we were in a video game, these would be the dragons we’d have to slay before we could get to the princess.
For example, you want a new car. You focus on that new car. Yay! Then, your old car, which has been running ok, breaks down. And you think: “[Insert expletive of choice here]! I wanted a new car, and my car breaks down! This LOA crap doesn’t work!” But what really happened is that every day, when you got into your old car, you thought “what a crappy car. I want a new car, not this pile of junk!” So, you were sending out “My car is a pile of junk!”, which is a belief that will keep you from that new car. Therefore, when you started lining up with the energy of the new car, that junky belief popped up and yelled “Hey there! You have to release me if you want a new car!” And since the negative feeling that belief created every time you got into your car wasn’t enough to get your attention, it got your car to break down. This is not a sign of failure. It’s a manifestation of a belief you have that is KEEPING YOU FROM WHAT YOU WANT!
You want these manifestations. They are helpful (as long as you know what they are). If these obstacles didn’t pop up, you’d possibly never reach your destination. You’d just be slowed down by invisible forces. But your resistance isn’t invisible. It’s smacking you in the face every chance it gets because in the grand scheme of things, it knows that this is the only way you’ll get what you want. It is smacking you in the face with love. And if you just realize that, heed the message and release those obstacles, you’ll reach your destination in no time.
That’s it. That’s the secret. See what you don’t want, figure out what you do want, focus on that, get into a state of allowing and play. That’s how we’re supposed to roll. We’re the ones who screwed it all up with our rules and horrible interpretations of necessary suffering and punishment and lessons and whatnot.
It’s like we went to this awesome, 3-D, virtual reality amusement park, with the most incredible and advanced rides and food and games, but then we started to worry about the safety and the sugar in the food, and we put on little suits and began organizing ourselves into groups so we could worry together. And we decided that it wasn’t an amusement park at all, but some kind of horrible test that was so hard that we could never win. And we started to make all kinds of arbitrary rules, like you can only have one candied apple per day or the cotton candy has to be either pink or blue. And we put speed limit signs up on the go cart track and decided that all the really cool rides were probably some kind of trap and so we outlawed this and shunned that, until we felt guilty every time we allowed ourselves to even dream of going into the fun house.
Turn on the lights and open your eyes. It’s an amusement park. All of it. I don’t know about you, but I’m going on the big, scary roller coaster. I will sit in the very front. I will not keep my arms in the carriage, but instead, flail them about like an epileptic having an orgasm. I will scream at the top of my lungs and laugh like a stoned hyena during the scary bits. I will not worry about my hair getting messed up, or whether or not I look like an idiot. I will be in the moment, completely immersed in my experience. And I will play with, not for, not against, but with everyone who wants to join me.
Ok, I get that this was still a high level explanation of the process and that more information might be valuable here. What do you think? Do you have a better understanding of the LOA? Do you still have questions? Give me your thoughts and ask your Q’s in the comments. What did you resonate with? What do you want me to explain further in future posts? Use your intuition and interact in a way that makes you feel great!